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My Unique Child

If you are reading this I am guessing you are either a parent of a special needs child, you know someone who is or you are interested in my journey and experiences. This is not a forum for me to give professional advice - I am no expert. I am simply a mum trying to do my very best with the cards that have been dealt to me.

I will post links to sites that can give you professional advice and I will post articles on specific subjects occasionally. But in general I will just share my thoughts and the lessons I have learnt and am still learning on my journey. This special needs parenting lark is hard - and if I can make you feel in any way that you are not alone, or if I can give you ideas or strategies for dealing with issues more effectively then I have succeeded in my goal.

You have a very privileged role as a special-needs parent. You are your child's advocate. If you don't fight for him, who will? If you don't speak up or him, who will? If you don't cherish him, nurture him and love him - who will? It's no coincidence that you and your child are doing life together... you are the best person for the job of looking after him - no one else has the unique blend of personality, patience and skills that fit your child's needs quite like you do.

It's not an easy road; it has many twists and turns; ups and downs - but you will experience moments of pure joy on that journey. As you travel down the road of special needs parenting you will go through storms and get stuck in pot holes but you will also experience rainbows, pick wild flowers and see stunning sunsets. Only a select few parents are asked to go on this journey - what a privilege. So strap up, hold on tight, surround yourself with good friends and skilled professionals, take a big breath and lets go.


I Love You to Pluto and Back

From the moment you were conceived you were my baby, my perfect God-given child. With every day that passed I loved you more. I held you that first day in wonder at your perfection, your tiny fingers, your fuzzy back, your dark blue eyes so alert as you suckled contentedly.

Today you constantly amaze me with your facts about planets, your love of knowledge, your capacity for new information. You make me smile with your witty comments and your blunt honesty about every day life. I love the way you view life - uncoloured by expectation, opinion or the unwritten rules of society.

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Spare The Rod And Spoil The Child?

'You must beat it out of them' 'You have to break the spirit' 'A short sharp smack is what you need - shock them' 'It has to hurt to be a deterrent otherwise what's the point?' 'If you love your children you will smack them - it's the only way to show them who's boss'

Have you heard any of these or do you agree with any of these? These are all direct pieces of advice I have been given over the last five years. Smacking is one of those controversial areas that evokes all sorts of emotional and moral responses, but rarely (as far as I can work out) is it based on logic.

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Because That What Supermums Do

You know it's going to be one of those days when you are awakened by your toddler screaming at 4am which inevitably leads to a very grumpy 4 year old appearing in your bedroom "Mum, Fin's screaming scared me and it made my bladder implode so my wee wee came out all over my bed". Read more

Being Ben Gorman

My name is Ben, I am 4 and I have Aspergers. I have a Mummy and Daddy who love me very much.

When God made me he gave me an extra special brain which makes me very special and unique. Sometimes this makes me stand out for some very good reasons. I am very funny, loving and very clever - if you just give me a chance you will see this side of me and learn to love me for who I am. Read more

Mummy Go Away

'Mummy go away' came the harsh but innocent voice of my precious little boy. It's not that he doesn't love me or want to be close to me but simply that once again I was disturbing his precious bedtime routine with his daddy. Read more

From Big Fat Positive to Big Fat Despair (and back again)

The moment you see the big fat positive your life changes forever. Your mind starts swimming with thoughts of nappies, cribs and your grandma's hand knitted bootees. Read more