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Tag: Aspergers

8

I Cried Today

I cried today. As my first born made his miraculous entrance into my life and gasped his first breath. My heart was overwhelmed with a protective love and I marvelled at his perfection.

I cried today. When the loneliness of being a new mum became my reality. When my everyday became a monotonous turnover of feeds, sleeps and nappies. When the incessant and inconsolable cries of my baby became my new normality.

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2

Is Christ another name for Santa?

In our family we take Christmas pretty seriously. I mean apart from the fact that I get lots of new clothes and handbags, it is the celebration of the birthday of this guy Jesus who is central to our faith.

Inspired by the question of a fellow tweeting mummy (@theboyandme) about how to explain Christmas to a toddler, I thought I’d ask Ben his thoughts to see how well I have done over the last 5 years…

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2

I Am Special

My name is Ben and I am five. Mummy says that I have a very special brain and that is why we were allowed to go on all the rides at Legoland without queuing. I think that I am all special, not just my brain. I have special eyes and ears and hair and even a special bottom that is extra good at trumping and that is why everybody loves me.

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5

Disabled? Me? Take a look at yourself!

Apparently my child is disabled. There are some days when I think about this 'diagnosis' and I laugh at how utterly absurd it sounds. How can my gorgeous, unique, loving, normal looking little boy be classed as disabled?

There are other days when I am so utterly drained by the end of the day that I draw some kind of relief that he is 'disabled'. Somehow it makes me feel slightly better. I am not just a failing mum, incapable of keeping my child under control, unable to command any level of respect and an utter failure at protecting my toddler or kids at the playcentre from his impulsive shoving or poking.

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3

Today

Today when you come into my room at 5.30am I won't grunt and turn over instead I'll welcome you with a smile and a cuddle

Today I will make your favourite breakfast and let you eat as little or as much as you want

Today I won't get uptight when you run around the house when I am trying to get you dressed; I will run round with you

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3

I Love You to Pluto and Back

From the moment you were conceived you were my baby, my perfect God-given child. With every day that passed I loved you more. I held you that first day in wonder at your perfection, your tiny fingers, your fuzzy back, your dark blue eyes so alert as you suckled contentedly.

Today you constantly amaze me with your facts about planets, your love of knowledge, your capacity for new information. You make me smile with your witty comments and your blunt honesty about every day life. I love the way you view life - uncoloured by expectation, opinion or the unwritten rules of society.

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