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Tag: Parenting

0

When I'm An Old Lady

When I'm an old lady I'll have bright pink hair
I'll fart very loudly and really won't care

What others may think of my hair or my bowels
Or the fact that my whiskers stick out more when I scowl

Though scowls will be rare for the worries of youth
Will fade away fast along with my tooth

Talking of teeth, I'll not bother with that
And never again will I think I'm too fat

For each extra roll of blubber will be
Proof that my life was full and happy

I'll eat full fat butter and chew bacon rind
I'll even share if I'm feeling kind

When I was a teen my life was a mess
A battle of hormones, boys and school tests

My focus in life was my looks and my weight
I'd write down every mouthful I ate

The calorie content of every last bite
Determined if my day had gone right

I'd walk round the house trying to act tough
Inside i just wanted to be good enough

As an adult it was all about building my life
Getting married, children and being a good wife

Sometimes I did good, sometimes I did not
But I flippin well gave it my very best shot

I'll admit my two boys weren't the easiest
I just wanted for them the very best

Was I hiding behind the special needs label?
Or was their behaviour because I just wasn't able

To be the mum they needed me to be
To create the perfect family

When I'm am old lady, I'll have bright pink hair
I'll fart really loudly and really wont care

I'll write to the young me with wisdom because
I'll tell me that I was alright just as I was

I'll make sure I know all the things I have learnt
That love and acceptance are just there - they're not earned

That I didn't have to strive to be perfect
That despite cheap shampoo I am totally worth it

Now I look at my handsome boys - now grown
I remember the tears of love once sewn

I'll tell me about the men they've become
How incredibly proud I am to be their mum

Now that I'm old I'm not sure pink is quite right
Perhaps a little brash and slightly too bright

I'll stick to my God given colour instead
Maybe a slight tweak - maybe pillar box red

8

I Cried Today

I cried today. As my first born made his miraculous entrance into my life and gasped his first breath. My heart was overwhelmed with a protective love and I marvelled at his perfection.

I cried today. When the loneliness of being a new mum became my reality. When my everyday became a monotonous turnover of feeds, sleeps and nappies. When the incessant and inconsolable cries of my baby became my new normality.

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4

But You're Just A Mum

'But you don't work, you're just a mum'

Sound familiar? Let me just tell about some of the jobs I have had:

Conference Coordinator:
Organising the annual Social Science Conference for a University. This involved logo/image design, marketing, deciding on key themes to be addressed, finding, persuading and coordinating professors/lecturers from across the UK to come and speak for a nominal fee on their field of expertise.

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5

Disabled? Me? Take a look at yourself!

Apparently my child is disabled. There are some days when I think about this 'diagnosis' and I laugh at how utterly absurd it sounds. How can my gorgeous, unique, loving, normal looking little boy be classed as disabled?

There are other days when I am so utterly drained by the end of the day that I draw some kind of relief that he is 'disabled'. Somehow it makes me feel slightly better. I am not just a failing mum, incapable of keeping my child under control, unable to command any level of respect and an utter failure at protecting my toddler or kids at the playcentre from his impulsive shoving or poking.

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3

Today

Today when you come into my room at 5.30am I won't grunt and turn over instead I'll welcome you with a smile and a cuddle

Today I will make your favourite breakfast and let you eat as little or as much as you want

Today I won't get uptight when you run around the house when I am trying to get you dressed; I will run round with you

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3

I Love You to Pluto and Back

From the moment you were conceived you were my baby, my perfect God-given child. With every day that passed I loved you more. I held you that first day in wonder at your perfection, your tiny fingers, your fuzzy back, your dark blue eyes so alert as you suckled contentedly.

Today you constantly amaze me with your facts about planets, your love of knowledge, your capacity for new information. You make me smile with your witty comments and your blunt honesty about every day life. I love the way you view life - uncoloured by expectation, opinion or the unwritten rules of society.

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